Um. Wow.

The well-known political analyst, Ludacris, has written a song indicating his support for Barack Obama. Oh goodie! I was on pins and needles wondering who Luda would thrown his considerable political clout behind.

A sample lyric from "Politics: Obama is Here:
Paint the White House black and I'm sure that's got 'em terrified
McCain don't belong in any chair unless he's paralyzed

Still another:
Said I handled his biz and I'm one of his favorite rappers
Well give Luda a special pardon if I'm ever in the slammer
Better yet put him in office, make me your vice president
Hillary hated on you, so that ***** is irrelevant

And here's the video:


Um. Wow. This makes Kanye West's post-Katrina analysis seem like a doctoral thesis defense.

Obama has of course denounced the rapper's sentiment that one of our greatest heroes should be paralyzed (but you can't argue with the logic that Ludacris should be VP). A spokesman said "As Barack Obama has said many, many times in the past, rap lyrics today too often perpetuate misogyny, materialism, and degrading images that he doesn't want his daughters exposed to.

Of course, that doesn't mean Obama isn't a fan of funky beats. In a recent issue of Rolling Stone, Obama praised Ludacris as a man of "great talents" and a "great businessman."

Now, if only Bruce Willis would start rapping, then we could decide the fate of our nation with a rap battle instead of an election.

Ridin' Dirty

I should have seen it coming. Heck, even Chamillionaire tried to warn me. But did I listen? Nooooooooooo.

“Brian,” he said,
“Police think they can see you lean;
You tint so it ain't easy to be seen…
They see you rollin'
They hatin'
Patrollin'
They tryin' to catch you ridin’ dirty.”

After 6 and-half-hours driving and with nearly 400 miles under my belt, the red and blue strobes of a Missouri Highway Patrol cruiser appeared in my rear view mirror.

The Trooper was very polite and I was too since

a) I knew it couldn’t be anything major and my cruise control was set at 70 and
b) I’d be that way regardless.

Turns out my windows are illegally tinted. He tested it (I wonder how much of my taxes went toward providing each state trooper a window tint tester) and apparently my tint allows only 15 percent of the light in and the legal limit is 35 percent. I explained that I bought the car with the tint already on and it hadn’t been a problem in the three years I’d been in the state, but he gave me a ticket any way. $83. Plus, I have to pay to have the tint removed.

While I am certainly annoyed that I have to drop $83, I even more annoyed that a piece of dark glass ruined my perfect driving record. If I were going to blemish it, it should at least be for going 125 while running from the cops and stashing the dope or something.

I’m still going to claim it’s perfect, because it doesn’t count against my license and it doesn’t affect my insurance.

In the end, I guess I should thankful he didn’t write me a ticket for being white and nerdy.

That and he didn't find the kilo of coke in the trunk.