5.11.07

Blame St. Nick for all Your Problems


Good news! It's no longer my fault that I'm overweight! Forget the fact that I knowingly choose to eat fatty foods, shun veggies and perfer to watch mediocre-at-best television shows instead of exercising, no! It's all Santa's fault! His carbon-emitting, eight-reindeer sleigh is probably to blame for global warming, too. Santa is a role model for children; he should totally be driving a hybrid by now. He's probably withholding the cure for cancer, too. Jerk. Where's my lawyer?

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