Road Trip ’08 - Day 4

Syracuse, NY to Niagara Falls, ON
?? miles, 3 hours, 19 minutes Total miles so far: ??
States driven through: New York, Ontario
Dead deer seen on side of road: 14
Smokies: 23
Cranky Canadian Border Guards: 1
Royal Canadian Mounties seen: 0

Today we woke, bid a fond farewell to Syracuse, and hit I-90 West. A couple tolls and some insanely tall bridges later, we were in Canada (America’s Hat), ready to soak in the glorious splendor that is Niagara Falls (get it? Soak?).

I must admit that I am impressed. Even as I sit in my hotel room I can see the Falls, feel the spray and hear the roar. And now I need to go to the bathroom. Excuse me.

Niagara Falls (Horseshoe Falls + American Falls) is pretty darn big. It’s very overwhelming and hard to get the scale of everything, but I can definitively say it/they is/are bigger than the only other waterfall I’ve ever seen, Price Falls. The spray from Horseshoe Falls alone rises twice the height of the Falls itself. I can’t imagine anyone thinking they could stuff themselves into a barrel and survive. Crazy Canuks.

We parked upriver from Horseshoe Falls and walked past it about a half-mile to face American Falls. We were going to ride the Maid of the Mist and get a close up view of both Falls, but they weren’t running for some reason. Oh well, we got a pretty spectacular view anyway and saved that $12. I’ll just zoom in on my pictures and have Leslie flick water at me.

EDIT: We asked Pat about the Maid and Mist (you’ll meet Pat in a second) and she told us it’s closed until the end of May because of ice in the river. Leslie and I both visited the Maid of the Mist’s website multiple times and we read nothing about it being closed for the winter.

My poor, bald forehead is sunburned. That makes me a sad panda.

We walked up the Niagara “strip” and did some shopping and had a snack at Wendy’s, then went shopping some more so I could stock up on postcards. The lady who sold me the postcards asked me if was ready to “check oot,” which made me happy. We went through a fun Hershey’s chocolate store and proudly passed by the Hard Rock Café, confident in the knowledge that we were both way too cool for that place. Besides, we have to save our Rock and Roll memorabilia quota for tomorrow.

One of the biggest things here is maple syrup. I’ve never really made a connection between Canada and Syrup, but it makes sense: Canada = maple leaf = maple tree = maple syrup. I may have to buy a bottle.

I know it’s “just” Canada and Niagara Falls is pretty darn American, but I enjoy the fact that I’m technically driving in a foreign country.

Speaking of foreign countries, the dude at the “immigration” booth was cranky. I had an easier time and faced fewer question getting into Russia. Oh, and he totally stiffed us on the passport stamps.

We’re on the 10th floor and have a great view of both Falls, so long as I don’t look straight down.

For dinner, we decided on the buffet at the top of our hotel, but to kill some time we sat in the room and watched an Animal Cops marathon. Many kittens, puppies and horses were saved. Oh, and while we were watching, the window washer “rappelled” down past our 10th floor and cleaned our windows for us. They are now quite clear. I expect wayward gulls from the Falls (there are millions of them) to start flying into the glass any second.

Up on the 18th floor in the “Riverview Restaurant,” Leslie and I each ordered the Chef’s Buffet for $39.95 (Canadian… which equals $43.94 US. Curse the weak dollar!). It was pricey, but hey, you only live once. It wasn’t AMAZING, but I ate my fill and enjoyed pleasant conversation while watching the falls from mine lofty perch on high amongst the soaring eagles and the whispers of the heavens. Sorry. I got hit with a wave of poetry there. Giant water falls have a tendency to do that to a man.

Leslie’s favorite part of dinner was without a doubt Pat, our server. I’m not sure why or how Pat charmed her way into Leslie’s short, Korean heart, but dagnabbit she did. How much did Leslie like Pat? This much: We were steps away from the elevator when I jokingly suggested we should get a picture with Pat. I turned around and Leslie was chasing Pat down. Memories. Sweet memories.

We’re having to make this leg of the trip sans Internet, so after dinner we grabbed the laptop and took a short walk to see if we could pirate a free signal and hook in to the Matrix. No such luck.

We did, however, succeed in getting me a bottle of Canadian Coke to add to my collection AND awesome bottle of the aforementioned maple syrup. I’m hoping I can convince someone it’s very expensive fine Canadian bourbon and make them drink a shot.

Back in the room, we’re watching the Best of Chris Farley. That’s one of the things I like most about Leslie: she is so smart and appreciates the highest exploits of human culture, yet she can rock out to Britney Spears and laugh her head off at Chris Farley.

Leslie’s superhero-like crime-fighting sense of smell detected the telltale scent of pot in the hallway and she let hotel management know. That’s another thing I like about Leslie: she’s a model citizen, no matter what country she’s in.