SBC 2008 Day 2 - ... And Some, Evangelists

It never fails to infuriate me that the ratio of services to the perceived luxury of a hotel is an inverse one. I can go to any two-star Drury Inn on the planet, get free (fast) wireless, a hot breakfast with bacon, eggs, sausage, do-it-yourself waffle bar and free parking AND a complimentary USA Today all for $67. But once you’re forced to stay in a “classy” place in a major city, you end up paying $22 a day for parking, there is no Internet available and “breakfast” consists of a banana and an old bagel. Seriously, people, come on. Serenity now!

OK, my heart rate is coming back down.

As I checked in last night I saw a drunk dude passed out on one of the hotel’s sofas in the lobby. He was still there as of 8:49 this morning.

Today my only assignment is to write a few grafs on the third preacher of the morning during the annual meeting of the Council of Southern Baptist Evangelists (COSBE… Cosby… get it? HA! Cosby!). You know you’re hard-core if you attend the SBC Annual Meeting. You’re a step up if you attend both the SBC and the pastor’s conference the day before. You’re among an “elite” few indeed if you’re up for the COSBE meetings the Saturday and Sunday before that! There’s maybe 800 people here this morning, compared with the 9K expected for the SBC annual meeting. I’m not saying the COSBE guys think they’re better than the rest of us or that anyone is in any way Pharisaical, I’m just pointing out that you must have tons of free time and a LONG attention span if you make it to all three.

I’ve set up camp outside the ballroom, and it’s a good thing too, because I just missed/escaped the obligatory “turn around and rub your neighbor’s shoulders” moment. Darn.

On a slightly more serious note, I do have a great respect for these men and women who have answered God’s call to be vocational evangelist. Sometimes these folks get a bad rap because we tend to associate them with people like Oral Roberts, Benny Hinn and Joel Osteen. Being an evangelistic isn’t a bad thing (usually... see the man pictured above). Ephesians 4:11 more or less says that God appointed some to be teachers, some to be pastors, some to be prophets, some to be apostles and some to be evangelists. That’s a good thing, because that’s not my gift.

Back to the petty stuff: I hate it when people tell jokes and then say, “you’ll get that one later.” No, I “got” it now, it’s just not funny.

Probably the worst thing about being a Christian (you don’t get to start many sentences that way) is that there’s a good chance you might some day be associated with lame Christian t-shirts. I just saw an example on an 11-year-old kid:

SAY TENNIS ACE
TEEN KING LYRE

The ONLY way this shirt MIGHT be acceptable would be if you’re a 15-year-old Christian who plays tennis, likes Shakespeare but can’t spell. If you don’t meet ALL that criteria, you need to go back home and change into an orange shirt that says Jesus but looks like the Reese’s logo.